Humour

Internet giant Facebook rushes to ban mentions of turnips. Fake news still okay

Nov 21st, 2016 | By
zuckerberg2

By Urban Anomie Owing to recent criticisms and to the world’s disgust over turnips, the king of social media has made a move to ban any and all topics of conversations surrounding the unsightly vegetable. In a Nov. 20 Facebook post, CEO Mark Zuckerberg voiced his concerns, and reminisced how his grandmother made him eat turnips

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Massive sinkhole swallows neighbourhood of Silverado, Calgarians ask ‘where the hell is that?’

Aug 15th, 2013 | By
Calgary Sinkhole

By Urban Anomie The tsunami that struck Calgary and the town of High River in June has left the city with countless sinkholes – some capable of swallowing people, some, entire city blocks. On Thursday, the southwest neighbourhood of Silverado was noticed to be missing by a mail carrier on her route, and experts agree that

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Calgary honours Toronto mayor Rob Ford with prestigious white asshat

Aug 12th, 2013 | By
Rob Ford Asshat

By Urban Anomie CALGARY, AB – The City of Calgary’s Mayor’s Office recognized their Toronto counterpart, Rob Ford, on Monday with the traditional Smithbilt asshat, placing him in elite company alongside Tom Cruise and Roger ‘that guy who blocks people on Twitter for no reason’ Millions – the only other recipients to receive the honour. Calgary’s

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U of C researcher cracks the mystery of disappearing honeybee colonies

Aug 11th, 2013 | By
Honeybee pollinating flower

By Urban Anomie Entire honeybee colonies around the world are either dying off or disappearing altogether. The phenomenon has been aptly named Colony Collapse Disorder (aka We’re Screwed if the Bees Disappear Disorder) and it’s being reported in every region on the planet. Honeybees play an integral part in the ecosystem. As much as 1/3 of

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Crowchild Trail to be converted into ‘urban bicycling highway’

Aug 5th, 2013 | By
Bike lane Calgary

By Urban Anomie Crowchild Tr., one of Calgary’s busiest expressways running along the west side of the city, will be converted entirely into bicycle lanes this fall, as part of the City’s ongoing cycling strategy. Officials with the City’s Transportation Department say Calgary is desperately lacking in cycling infrastructure, and their goal is to make Calgary

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Police, City urge calm after shark attack in Bow River leaves Calgary man with extensive injuries

Jul 31st, 2013 | By
Great White Calgary

By Urban Anomie CALGARY, AB — The July 31 shark-attack on a Calgary man inside city limits has prompted Calgary Police to suspend all water activities in the Bow and Elbow River, as well as the Glenmore Reservoir, until the shark is caught. The incident occurred just off Prince’s Island Park, and the victim—who is alive,

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Benny the Bear opens up about sex, drugs, and alcohol abuse on the set of Buck Shot

Jul 28th, 2013 | By

By Urban Anomie CALGARY, AB — Benny the Bear is the latest celebrity to open up about the candid details of his personal life in a memoir. The 57-year-old ex-television star who was made famous as Ron “Buck Shot” Barge’s sidekick on The Buck Shot Show is out with a new memoir, titled “Benny: More Than

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The Land Before Time LXVII announced at SDCC

Jul 20th, 2013 | By

By Urban Anomie During Universal Studios’ press conference at the San Diego Comic Con on Saturday, Universal’s Head of Animation and Development, Dale Warwick unveiled the studio’s summer blockbuster production of The Land Before Time 67, slated to open on July 4, 2014. “We’re tremendously excited to announce the next instalment of The Land Before Time

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Former lobster restaurant employee admits to burning down 16th Ave. location after years of ‘shovelling that shit onto plates’ caused him to snap

Jul 19th, 2013 | By
Lobster

By Urban Anomie CALGARY, AB – Investigators with the Calgary Fire Dept. say they’ve uncovered the motives behind a mysterious fire at a restaurant in the city’s N.W. in the fall of 2011, that forced the closure of the chain restaurant. Former sous chef, Steven White (26), has been charged with arson, mischief, criminal insanity, and

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Video games blamed for violent incident at Calgary kindergarten

Jul 16th, 2013 | By
Video game violence

By Urban Anomie CALGARY, AB — Video games are getting more bad rep this week, after a senior official with the Calgary Police Service blamed them for a recent violent incident that took place in the city. The perpetrator — who is only five years old and was last seen wearing jean coveralls and a red

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